


lemon drops

by moralityism



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Inspired By Tumblr, Sympathetic Deceit Sanders
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-21
Updated: 2018-11-21
Packaged: 2019-08-26 20:45:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16688548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moralityism/pseuds/moralityism
Summary: In which Anxiety might not be as threatening as he tries to be.





	lemon drops

**Author's Note:**

> birthday fic for @cremebrulesides on tumblr, based on her [post](https://cremebrulesides.tumblr.com/post/179261196757/patton-lying-i-will-only-have-one-cookie) in which anxiety and deceit are summoned when people are scared or lie, respectively.

“You just don’t have any sense of propriety!”

“I don’t—that’s rich coming from the guy who  _regularly_ walks away from dinner in the middle of the meal because his books are more important!”

Patton shuffles his feet awkwardly. Logan and Roman have been at each other’s throats all day – they’re both exhausted by the planning for the new video. Patton knows he needs to intervene, but can’t seem to find a good place to jump in.

Logan scoffs. “Well, pardon me for attempting to ensure Thomas’ continued wellbeing. We all know  _you_  don’t have any role in that.”

“If it were up to  _you_ ,” Roman snarls, eyes narrowed, “Thomas would still be an  _engineer_.”

Logan snips, “I still don’t see what’s wrong with that.” He crosses his arms. “Better job security, a higher potential of impact on the world around us…”

Roman snorts. “Yeah, he made such an impact stuck in a lab all day.”

Patton raises a hand. “Maybe we should all calm down a little?” he suggests mildly.

“Stay  _out_  of this, Patton!” they shout in unison without even glancing at him. He shrinks back immediately as they return to their argument. He can feel his face heat up. He furiously rubs his eyes with the back of his hand. Bursting into tears isn’t going to help anyone.

An arm wraps lazily around Patton’s shoulders, clad in black plaid. Patton sniffles and glances to his right as Anxiety leans on him, all false calm. “Wow,” he says, “nobody invited me to the asshole party? I’m almost insulted.”

“Language,” Patton murmurs, and Anxiety gives his shoulder a brief squeeze.

“What do you want, Anxiety?” Roman sighs, finally turning away from Logan.

Anxiety removes his hand from the odd side-hug he had offered Patton in order to cross his arms. “Well,” he muses, “as much as I’d love to watch you two tear each other apart for no reason, I forgot the popcorn. So I’m gonna have to ask you to maybe have an ounce of chill. Go to your room, take a nap or something.”

Roman puts a hand to his sword. “And what gives you the right to tell me what to do?”

Anxiety draws himself up to his full height, towering over Roman. He slouches so often, Patton forgets how tall he actually is. Roman takes a step backward, nearly involuntarily. “I’d really hate for something to happen to that sword of yours, Princey,” Anxiety tells him.

The meaning is clear. Roman huffs but sinks out without another word.

Logan steps forward. “Thank you, Anxiety. He was being completely unreasonable. I could barely argue with him.”

Anxiety turns to look at him, one eyebrow raised. “Uh, I was talking to both of you.” Logan blinks, seeming offended. “Yeah, you heard me, go on.” Logan hesitates for a moment, evidently debating the pros and cons of fighting Anxiety, and then sinks out after Roman.

Anxiety spins to face Patton, face softening. “You good?”

Patton nods, face still red. “I’m fine!” he chirps.

Anxiety doesn’t reply. He frowns and looks up at the ceiling, holding his arms out to catch the black blur that suddenly comes falling out of nowhere. Deceit lands safely in Anxiety’s arms and crosses his legs with a flourish. “Hello, Morality,” he greets calmly, as if he didn’t just come through the ceiling.

Anxiety barely spares him a glance. He asks a bewildered Patton, “You sure about that?”

Patton stares at them. “I’ve, um…well, I’ve been better,” he admits. “I just wish I could stop things before they get…like that.” He can feel tears pricking at his eyes again.

“Murder is always an option,” Deceit suggests.

“Murder is  _never_  an option,” Anxiety retorts immediately, “try again.”

“Well, you know me,” Deceit says. “I give all my best suggestions when I don’t have any idea what’s going on.”

“…Fair.”

They both look to Patton to explain. Anxiety is still holding Deceit. Neither of them seem particularly uncomfortable with the arrangement.

Patton hesitates. “I…well…Logan and Roman got all huffy because they’re tired and then they started fighting and I couldn’t get them to stop a-and…” He’s crying again, even though he feels like he’s mostly calmed down. “They both yelled at me to stay out of it…”

Anxiety gives him a concerned glance. Deceit produces a handkerchief out of nowhere and hands it to Patton. Patton blows his nose and offers it back, but Deceit wrinkles his nose. “…keep it.” Patton blinks, but shoves it into his pocket.

“So,” Anxiety says, once it’s clear that Patton’s tears have slowed, “they yelled at you? Why didn’t you yell back?”

“I can’t…” Patton pauses. “If I yell at them, it’ll only escalate things more.”

Anxiety frowns. “Still, you can’t just let them walk all over you.”

“I dunno, Anxiety,” Deceit drawls, “I’m pretty sure the best parents are the ones who never punish their kids.”

“Still…I don’t want to be mean.”

Deceit breaks out into a wide grin, one eyebrow raised. “You don’t  _seriously_  think the only way to solve problems is Anxiety’s way?”

“What’s wrong with my way?”

“The height difference, mostly,” Deceit deadpans. Anxiety tilts his head in agreement.

Patton distantly wonders if Anxiety’s arms are getting tired. “Well, but, what else am I supposed to do? I don’t want to upset them…”

“I think they were…already upset.” Anxiety huffs. “You don’t have to yell at ‘em, but you gotta draw the line somewhere, or this’ll keep happening.”

Patton shuffles his feet. The idea of chastising the others makes his chest hurt, but he knows Anxiety’s right. He needs to stand up for himself (and for Thomas) when it counts. “I guess…”

“If that’s all settled…” Deceit pushes himself out of Anxiety’s grasp and lands on his feet, smoothing imaginary wrinkles out of his clothes. “I certainly have nothing better to do than stand around up here. See you two later!” He’s gone before Patton can reply.

Anxiety crosses his arms. “I think he’s binging Steven Universe,” he explains. “He’s not trying to be rude. Probably.”

“Oh! He didn’t have to interrupt his show to come all the way up here!”

Anxiety shrugs. “Well, he can’t really help it. He’s summoned whenever one of us lies, y’know?”

Patton blinks. He hadn’t realized that, although it’d explain why he always feels eyes on him whenever he tells a lie. “Oh. I always just figured that was my own sense of morality kicking me in the butt.”

“Morality seems fairly harmless,” Anxiety teases, and Patton smiles wide at the pun.

He stops. “Wait, then what brought you up here?”

“You got all freaked out.” Anxiety grins suddenly, sharp and wide. “And when another Side shows insecurity, I appear.”

Patton smiles back at him. “Well, I’m glad you showed up to help!”

Anxiety pouts for the briefest of moments, and Patton realizes too late that he might have been trying to be threatening. “Uh, if you’re all good here, I’m – I gotta go make sure Deceit eats something for lunch…” He hesitates, obviously conflicted. “But, y’know, if you ever need a break from those two, you’re always welcome downstairs. We don’t do much in the way of sweets, and Deceit’s birthday is coming up, so…”

Patton gasps and claps his hands together. “I’d love to help you make a cake for – mmphf!” Anxiety slaps a hand over his mouth.

“Thanks, yeah, please don’t be so loud,” he hisses.

Patton pulls the hand off his mouth and asks in a stage-whisper, “Oh, is it a surprise?” Anxiety nods quickly. “Okay! Your secret is safe with me!” He mimes zipping his mouth shut, which seems to make Anxiety smile even if he doesn’t seem any less worried.

“Alright, okay, cool,” he mutters under his breath, backing away slightly. “I’m gonna go then. Uh, I don’t like working hard so you can basically come get me whenever you want—”

“Anxiety?”

“Yeah?”

Patton tilts his head and smiles. “Thanks for coming to help me. I mean it.”

Anxiety’s face turns bright red. “Just doing my job,” he mumbles, and sinks out hurriedly.

Patton stands there in the quiet for a moment. Logan and Roman are probably fast asleep by now. He glances down at the handkerchief hanging out of his pocket.

_Wonder if Deceit would like lemon cake?_ , he muses, bouncing off towards the kitchen.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm really bad about transferring my fics here, so if you like this you can find more similar ones on my [tumblr](moralityism.tumblr.com/tagged/my-writing)!


End file.
